Childishness versus Foolishness

In life and certainly in parenting, there are two realms of wrong. The first realm is called, “childishness,” and represents the unintentional and non-malicious mistakes made in life. With children, it is often the result of a lack of knowledge or lack of understanding. Your son or daughter does something wrong, but he/she did not know it was wrong. There was no intent to do wrong. Childishness can also be attributed to age and the lack of physical coordination. A four-year-old drips orange juice on the floor, because the glass was too full to carefully manage.

In the second realm, a child knowingly and intentionally chooses to act in defiance without regard to consequence or injury to self or others. The child knows that he is doing wrong, and continues anyway. This is referred to in scripture as, “Foolishness.”

One of the more common mistakes parents make in the process of correction is that they fail to recognize the difference between childishness and foolishness, thereby treating all wrong the same way. That is neither fair to the child nor a wise way to parent. While wrongful acts of childishness and foolishness need correction, what separates the two realms is motive and intent. There is a difference between the mistakes of childhood and purposeful disobedience.

Spilling a glass of water is childishness. Intentionally spilling a glass of water on a sibling is foolishness. Accidently hurting a sibling while playing is childishness; intentionally striking a sibling for winning the game is foolishness. There is a big difference between the child who accidentally dents the neighbor’s car, and the child who intentionally vandalizes it. When assessing behaviors in need of correction, parents should ask themselves, “Was my child’s wrongful action born out of childishness or foolishness?”

How that question is answered will determine what happens next. Both childishness and foolishness require correction, but not the same type of correction.

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